Saturday, February 18, 2012

The Introduction


Alone in the woods,
finally removed
from the grievances of
unimportant importance—
And yet grandiose
homes are a mere
hundred feet away.
I try not to notice,
but you almost
feel
the over-stimulation permeating
your heart.

Cotton-tailed babes
watch under the brush
as though they were actually
hidden,
as the clip clop
of various passersby
hint toward the fact
that their once
pristine homeland
is now invaded
on a daily basis.

The hawks
are particularly chatty this morning
while mingling with
the vultures and sparrows
all riding around on the
invisible blustering winds,
playing as I’d imagine any
of us would if given the
chance of flight.

Never though—
after euphorically
enjoying the nuances
of the man-made trails
had the miniscule
moths,
maybe butterflies,
come out in abundance.
Whatever they were
they were beautiful,
like petals from
cherry blossom trees
in spring
after a windy day,
ever so gently making
their way
down to the ground.

Perhaps they were
awoken from slumber
by my early morning
intrusion.
As some flew with me
while I ran underneath the
canopy of trees,
we clumsily touched
wings to skin,
almost a polite kiss hello
during an introduction.

All mornings
should start
with a kiss
hello—
so soft,
so gentle,
the feeling,
perhaps only perceived.


Wednesday, January 4, 2012

The Olive Life

I’ve been
an olive
on the tree
for so long
I had almost forgotten
the myths about what
it is like to be edible—
to be brined,
saturated,
changed for others
so they want
to consume you—
because to most
you taste delicious
in a savory-salty-
semi-firm-snack
sort of way
and if lucky enough,
washed down
with just
the right sip
of wine.


Of course
there was a lot
of work to get
to this point,
a lot of waiting
too.
Flowering
was hard enough
as it was
considering the oddly
cold weather and
less than satisfactory
soil drainage.


I’m hanging on
with others around me,
spatially not close
enough to touch
the others—
none invading my space.
It’s December,
harvest season,
and I’m not
getting any younger.
I’m just sitting here
afraid to fall
and waste away
into the ground—
afraid to not be
picked while
all the others
are seen for what
they will be
shiny, black and scrumptious—
afraid to be picked
and changed
into something
deemed worth eating.
What to do,
what to do?
Oh my olive life.
Harvesters please wait just a little more.

Three

The lucky number seems to be three. I can’t get past it— my interest waivers and I feel as though someone has taken a figurative cloth and ever so gently placed it firmly over my nose and mouth. It’s then I cannot breathe. It’s then I only think of escape routes. It’s then I think of waking up beaten or lying next to a man as he says “at least take your pants off it’s not like it’s rape—“ Or the time another walks into the joint, sees me at work, and says “you’re good-looking, you’ll do for the day.” It’s then I don’t regret making it to three each time— least I make it out.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Something, Someone

The
lingering scent
of
the dainty cigarillo
drenched
in kahlua
puts me
in a different
mindset.

I’m
warm
with a
familiar feeling
of
something—
someone.

Exactly what
I do not
know.

But as I light
and slowly
take in a deep
and prolonged
taste
I sit back
against my spider-webbed
front porch,
feel the cool cement
against my thighs
and watch
as the locals
go about their evenings
as the sun begins
to set—
and just a touch
of fall has made
itself known.

I do not
yearn
or need
for another
to be
near me.

Damn
finished another.

So I get
just one more—
because they
came in a
four-pack.

I repeat
the ritual,
this time
with a glass
of blended
Spanish loveliness
by my side.

Now I’m
cheating
on the cigarillo,
poor baby.
I should stop
right there.

But alas
I sip
and taste deeply
well into the
evening—
enough for a
hoarse rawness
to flood my
voice when
I awake.
A reminder
of what,
or whom—

No answer still.

A Man and a Woman

A man and a woman
walked into my work
to try some wine.

The normal
semi-white trash
duo.

Hi guys, would you like to do
some tasting today?


He sported
a dripping forehead
with Buddy Holly glasses,
a leather vest,
and a plethora
of Disney characters
tattooed on
either side
of his Wonderbread loaf-sized
biceps.

She was
a fifty-something-
fake-pomegranate
redheaded-butterball
with
kind eyes—
hurt took
precedent behind
the algae- green tinge.

A sip here and there.
This is the Viognier, I tell them.


The pained ocean eyes
needed to let me
know
this was a good weekend—
one full of happiness
and relaxation.

Lies I can tell
she is trying to
convince
herself of.
The last
20 months she has
been grieving over the
suicide of her 17 year-old daughter.

Let us move on to the Chardonnay;
How was the last one?


The poor thing
left no note,
just herself
hanging
in her locked room.

She choked back
the salty waters
when recalling
how she
and her oldest
had to unhinge the door
to get inside,
only
too
late.

Shall we go on to the Pinot Noir?

To cope with
her pain
she now counsels
other
survivors of
suicide
and attends
meetings
daily.
It has
become her
life.

Apparently
her oldest
doesn’t grieve
in the same way
and refuses
to deal
at all
with the death
of her sister.

What reds do you normally drink?
Oh I see, you like big tannic Cabernets, interesting.
I myself love a good Bordeaux blend.


I wonder
what is the
best way
to grieve
with the death
of someone
so young—

So obviously lost
and alone
and naïve to
the glories and
insurmountable splendor
that the world
would have
offered her
if she had only
stuck it out
a little longer.

Shall we finish with the blend?
It’s mostly Syrah, a favorite of mine.


During all of this,
I nod, and
feel the pain
with her—
trying to
console the
now obviously glassy eyes.

Mr. Trendy tats
acts aloof—
an inheritance baby
that is openly glad
he has more money
than God to burn
and yet
he can’t find
a full shirt
to cover
his uncooked cinnamon roll bulges.

Well guys, any favorites today?


Life fucking hurts sometimes.
I hurt
for those kind eyes—
devastated on an
inconceivable level.

So I give her a discount
on the wine Trendy
buys for her.
She’s going
to need it.

Take care of yourself.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Albarino

Background noise
a buzz
of nonexistent words.
I’m on the other side—
my door is open
though there is no need.

I can taste
the happiness
of their laughter.
I can almost feel
their tickling,
it hangs thick—
and saturates my
otherwise dry night—
a night of a singular citrus libation
and breezy summer stroll
just before the sun
bids adieu.

Serious discussions of whirly-bird
popcorn, and unbuttered
kernels flutter across
the threshold.
Then the door closes
and I
can just about
make out
a hello there.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Cowboy Boots

I don't wear
cowboy boots often,
but when I do,
I wish I had someone
here to take them off,
because they're hard
enough when I am sober--
I have to use the other foot
to give me some leverage
to get out of the boot,
but it can hurt.
But when I have a few,
there is no way,
and I have to sleep with
them on.
And then my feet swell.
I wish I had someone
here to help me
take them off.